Wednesday, 18 November 2015

Breaking News - Wings over Hereford

A mixed squadron of Handley Page Heyfords, Herefords and Hampdens (which ‘ardly hever ‘appens, according to Leading Aircraftsman Doolittle) today carried out an experimental aerial reconnaissance over the occupied Cathedral City itself, reports the “Ludlow Leader”. Taking off at dawn from their secret landing strip in Shropshire (with the kind co-operation of the Shropshire Free State) and led in person by the famed Wing Commander Daring, the Independent Air Force squadron encountered no opposition as it undertook extensive reconnaissance and photography duties.
Wing Commander Douglas "Dauntless" Daring
The Fascist Anti-Aircraft defences were either in a poor state of repair, or Captain Macaroni and his Fiat CR32 were having an off day [note 1]. All our aircraft returned safely. “I counted them all out, and I counted them all back in.” boasted Leading Aircraftsman Doolittle.
Handley Page Herefords and Hampdens swoop low over unseasonal Herefordshire haymakers
 Local farmers blame Captain Arrowsmith for "climate change" (amongst many other things),
or point to the ungodly kidnap and continued detention of "their Bishop" as the reason
 for their poor harvest and the accompanying rise of "Mommetry".
The opportunity was taken to deliver thousands of information pamphlets (courtesy of Staff Captain Gallup) to the good citizenry of the Herefordshire capital - reminding all of Captain Arrowsmith’s alien choice of allies, murderous aversion to British dogs, and bad habit of parking his Behemoth on the double yellow lines in High Town.
Information Leaflets being delivered over  occupied Hereford. The parched nature of the countryside is evident.
An aerial photograph of All Saints Church, High Town. Arrowsmith's Behemoth
has either been towed away by Hereford's Traffic Wardens (an onerous endeavour)
or has been carefully camouflaged.
“It was just a little jaunt.” murmured Group Captain Daring, in the self - deprecating manner that the bar staff of “The Feathers” Hotel have grown accustomed to over these last few weeks. “A piece of cake, really. Some loops around the Cathedral tower, a barrel roll over the BUF Barracks in Whitecross Street, a full squadron 'V for Victory' formation over the White House and Market Square, and then back home in time for pink gins and popsies.” 
Leading the "V for Victory" formation over Hereford, Group Captain Daring gives
local residents a re-assuring wave. Their liberation is coming!
WW1 veteran Daring confirmed that the Ecclesiastical Intelligence Service had taken delivery of the reconnaissance photographs, which will no doubt be subjected to the most detailed analysis. Whatever the Anglican High Command may choose to do in the future as a result of this information, Ludlow - and Hereford itself - will always remember "The Daring Raid" [note 2].
(1). For the previous activities of Captain Macaroni and his Fiat CR32, see the Big Game Report on the Battle of Eardisley below (September 2014 Big Game).

(2). With due respect to the Leading Aircraftsman in need of elocution lessons, it could hardly be known as "The Doolittle Raid". Apparently, that is half a world away and some time in the future....


  1. And where will Wing Commander "Dauntless" Daring and his now famous 366 Squadron of the IAF pop up next? The Bishop clearly needs to nudge Mort towards developing rules for "carpet bombing" in a Big Game...